Scapegoats

"They terk er jerbs!!!"

If one spends any amount of time reading the Rants and Raves section of craigslist.com, one will inevitably come across a rant blaming most of this nation’s ills on the influx of illegal immigrants. I personally don’t buy the whole “illegal immigrants are coming up here to get free healthcare and education” argument. Granted, the kids of illegal immigrants are getting a free public education and the school system is spending extra money to accommodate them. However I doubt that easily accounts for the gaping financial holes that are swallowing many states’ economies.

A simple solution to the perceived problem of illegal immigrants taking advantage of the entitlement systems put into place is to only grant those entitlements to U.S. citizens. Yeah, I know. I’m a racist. Now, I’m pretty sure that some illegal immigrants might be able to forge the necessary documents to qualify for these entitlements, but those people would be in the vast minority.

One of the primary gripes regarding illegal immigration is the classic “They terk er jerbs!” argument. Stand up comedian Doug Stanhope made an interesting point about this argument. These guys who sneak across the border generally have tattered clothing, no shoes, and don’t speak any English. If a guy who matches that description is qualified to do your job, you might want to consider getting your GED and some vocational training.

Of course when enough people bitch about something, some elected official will find a way to rally some votes by promising to do something about it. Some have promised better enforcement of immigration laws. This would involve hiring more border patrol guards and requisitioning more transportation and equipment for these guards to carry out their duties. This of course would probably cost more money than what is already being spent on having the illegals here in the first place. It would ultimately be a waste because the folks who get caught and sent back to Mexico generally find another way in. It’s like a revolving door.

There has even been the proposal to build a giant fence along the U.S./Mexico border. That’s 1,969 miles of fence. That comes out to about 10,396,320 feet. The proposed fence would be about 15 feet high and have 2 layers. Imagine you wanted to build a 15 foot-high double-layered fence around your yard. Take the measurements and then call a building contractor. Have him quote you a price to have the fence built. Calculate how many dollars per foot the contactor would charge and multiply that number by 10,396,320. That’s how much a border fence would cost the taxpayers at a minimum. And this is of course assuming it won’t be a no-bid contract like so many Federal projects.

"F@#$ing mongorrians!! You tear down my shitty wall!!"

The total cost of the border fence would be a lot of money to spend on something that won’t even work. After all, it’s a fence not the Great Wall of China. Anyone determined enough to get in the U.S. can easily defeat a 2-layer 15-foot high fence. Even The Great Wall of China didn’t work as well as the ancient Chinese had hoped. The Mongol hoards still managed to breach the wall despite its impressive size and construction. I for one don’t like the idea of pissing away billions of dollars to not solve a problem that isn’t really that serious to begin with.

Illegal immigrants don’t come to the U.S. to mooch on our free health care. As a matter of fact, last time I checked we didn’t have free health care. Immigrants come to the U.S. to work. It’s as simple as that. When you see illegal immigrants here in the U.S. they’re usually hanging around Home Depot or a day labor office. They aren’t there just because it’s a nice place for a guy to cool his heels. They’re looking to do any work that they can to earn any money they can.

Compare these guys to the crack-whore welfare moms living on food stamps in government-assisted housing. Consider the woman in California who gave birth to octuplets recently. She has fourteen kids, lives in her mom’s house which is currently in foreclosure, she has no job, and she’s collecting food stamps. How does a person like this afford an in-vitro procedure that would produce octuplets? More importantly, why would she want even more kids if she’s on welfare? Considering these issues, is it really Juan the Wetback who is a burden upon our society? Should we really deport some guy back to Mexico because he wants to earn a better life for himself and his family? I for one would rather deport the welfare moochers. They might be here legally, but they have worn out their welcome a long time ago.